Diaries of a Hedgehog – Hai Peeps

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Albino hedgehog on a sheets of san francisco fluidproof sheet alongside a polished silver butt plugWe couldn’t believe it when one of our product reviewers, Emmeline Peaches, tested the strength of our fluidproof sheets via the sharp quills of her pet hedgehog. But, as it turns out, this little critter loves our sheets and (in an even bigger shock) has quite a lot to say herself! So, in a rather unprecedented act, allow us to introduce the diaries of SoSF brought straight to you from the paws of our now first hedgehog team member.

Hai world!

My name ish Tali and Mam has let me borrow her keypads in order to speak to you all. She also said I could use the mouse, but I can’t seem to find one. Ish a shame. I would have liked another friend.

Mam says to tell you a little bit about me and has bribed me with my favourite perching spot – the black fluidproof sheets. She calls them ‘Sheets of San Francisco’ which ish I guess another way of saying ‘relaxy place.’ Humans use strange phrases.

Humans do many strange things, actually.

Mam is what is known ash an ‘adult product reviewer’ and she brings many strange things in to the house. Sometimes I get to sniff them, but only ever when on the sheets. This is fun but when Mam wants to play with them she puts me away, takes the sheets for her own play time and then I hear many different odd noises.

Ish kinda like my huffy hoofy noises except with a different pitch. Then I hear Mam’s usual sounds except in long, loud ways. Ish weird.

When I use my huffs it’s to say I’m feeling grumps but Mam always seems happy after making her noises.

I don’t understand but I’m glad that the things Mam uses on the sheetz can make her so warm and fuzzy.

I ‘spose the moral of the story ish that, even if we don’t always understand things at first, being vocal, clear, and letting people know if we’re happy (and trying to notice it in the ones we care about) ish very important. Especially when fluidproof sheets and Mam’s fun things are involved.

I don’t snuff on my sheets but I do think on them a lot, it seems. I hope you enjoyed my thinkings and I shall be back next month.

Untilz my next sheet time!